Awkward guest or tired host?
I got you.
We all know the drill. We’ve done it multiple years. Maybe 50 times, 23 times, 35 times or 2 times. It's cyclical, our lives are cyclical. We can purposefully flow in the whirlwind of exciting energy that we know as the holiday season or without warning you can also be caught up, spit up and spat out; tired and miserable. It is up to each one of us to decide how we are going to enter this season and as I write this we are one month away from Christmas. Which is the holiday that I celebrate. I know not everyone celebrates this holiday. Culturally there are multiple holidays around this time of year. It doesn’t matter what holiday you are celebrating, It doesn’t matter if you don’t celebrate anything, you are in the season of hustle and bustle. How you ground yourself and create meals to nourish your system and prevent inflammation and stress are all going to serve you and others well. That is the theme for this week. It's about setting the foundation so that a weeknight party won’t send you over the edge nor a weekend gathering won’t make you ever want to host again. It's also about helping others and showing up for them if you are invited to their gathering.
I was with my friends yesterday and communicated with others over text and it comes down to the same thing. It's about the royal visit. While it made me laugh, I am curious to look at how it happens? What makes some people very comfortable not doing anything to contribute to the gathering and others jumping in to assist every time? I am reminded of one of my favorite weddings I have ever attended. Jim and Betsy invited their close friends and family to stay in a vacation house where the reception would take place. Together for a few days prior to the wedding, one friend was responsible for making the cake, another was taking photographs, my husband was the best man writing his toast, and it may be common today, however, over 30 years ago it was very expansive for me to see this community of friends come together to create an exceptional day. What happened was magical. All of the people got to know each other over the course of a few days, everyone helped because it wasn’t work, we wanted to be part of the creation of this beautiful memory. On the day of the wedding, we were energized, feeling closer, and isn’t that what we all want? Connection. I invite you to think like this as the holidays approach.
Its important during this season to have “go to back pocket" recipes because you want to make sure you are eating for strength, rebounding from the long weekend, and foundationally setting yourself up for a successful way to have a noninflammatory body on our way to the holiday break. After I host a large party I can ache to my bones from all of the set up. Moving hundreds of pounds of furniture, cooking, all of it leaves an impression. When we have helpers on the day of the party we no longer remember the work, only the joy of gathering and helping one another. If you normally host ask yourself if you are open to assistance. Sometimes we think we are yet our grip is pretty tight on the reins. If you are a guest and you honestly don’t know how to help but you would like to be part of the gang getting connected. I would kindly suggest, instead of asking how or where you can help (then the host has to figure out a job for you) do one of the following or come up with something even better:
If its a celebration where guests can bring an app or bottle of wine, do so.
Notice your surroundings, is it before dinner and the water glasses need filling? Ask the host would they prefer you fill from the refrigerator or a pitcher? Do not ask, do you want me to fill them? They may say no out of kindness.
If appetizers are coming out of the oven and onto the serving platter; you can grab the cocktail napkins and offer to pass them. (Especially if you don’t know many people at this party, it is a great way to get to know people.) Again, you need to read the room and understand how the host likes the party to flow. I have never turned away a helpful guest.
Find the matches or lighter and light the candles.
After dinner, you may help clear plates. Not immediately, if there is a flow of conversation, leave them, but if there is a lull that is a good time to get to it.
Find or ask for a kitchen towel and start drying or offer to wash since you may not know where dishes go. (This suggestion is no fun and often hosts are taking care of dishes as they go along, but if your same aunt or uncle each year is stuck join them and perhaps you will have a conversation you may not have had if you did not go into the kitchen. Put on a Spotify list and make it fun. Maybe others will join in!)
If this is not familiar then it is going to feel a bit uncomfortable for both the guest, who would like to help, and the host, who normally does everything. It is amazing how the atmosphere changes and the connections fly when there is a community of helpers. As the hosts reflect on the party the assistance received will be a bright spot of the evening. And when the guests reflect, if that's you, you will be glad you helped because it feels good.
Whether you are hosting or being hosted, remember to plan your week with nourishing foods, filled with diverse veggies and start with beans!
Recommended Recipe
We will be using red lentils this week. They are an excellent source of plant-based protein. One cup of the cooked lentils provides approximately18 grams of protein. They are also rich in dietary fiber which aids digestion and blood sugar regulation. The high fiber content in red lentils and other beans can contribute to a feeling of fullness. During this season we can have a tendency to overindulge; it is beneficial to have a meal complete with a feeling of satiety. I love red lentils for their versatility and I often add them to soups, stews, dahls or curries. Ok, onto the recipe.
Lentil mushroom bolognese
This recipe is stick to your ribs good. It’s a bean/vegetable version of the meat-based bolognese and I found it on minimalistbaker.com. It’s the first recipe I am sharing from this site and I enjoyed it fully. Their motto is it can be made in 1 bowl, 10 ingredients or less, or made in under 30 minutes. I love that. The mushroom and tomato paste provide a wonderful umami taste. Additionally, once you prepare it you can eat it a couple of different ways, over pasta, over a baked potato, over rice or other grain. On top of salad, or as a side next to scrambled eggs. On top of toast, with a poached or over easy egg for breakfast. Flex.
It is not a “go to” recipe like opening up a can of black beans but it is simple enough to whip up. Ready in less than 40 min (I include prep time) and you will have it for a few meals this week. If you eat meat, you could add a meat of your choice to the recipe but keep the lentils and the mushrooms.
Ingredients
Medium to large onion roughly chopped
Medium carrot roughly chopped
4 garlic cloves ~ 2 Tbsp
3 Tbsp of olive oil
8 oz whole baby bella or crimini mushrooms (I had some shitake, too)
2 Tbsp of tomato paste
1 tspn sea salt
¼ tspn crushed red pep (optional-I like a bit of heat)
1 28 oz can of crushed toms (I prefer to buy the whole and cut them up in the pot with kitchen shears or if I am using the processor, throw them in and pulse for a second)
1 ½ cups water (I had homemade veggie stock and I opted to use that instead)
½ cup uncooked red lentils (I added about 3/4 cup)
½ cup fresh basil (highly recommended by the recipe but I did not use it as it is not in season here.
12 oz dry pasta-I like pappardelle or tagliatelli. Rigatoni is good, too. This bolognese will stick to the pasta. It's nice to have a larger shape versus something thinner like an angel hair or spaghetti.
Peel and roughly chop the onion, carrot, and garlic and add them to a food processor. Pulse until finely chopped. No food processor, no problem, finely chop by hand.
Heat the olive oil in a large pot or Dutch oven over medium-high heat for a minute. Add the finely chopped onion, carrot, and garlic and sauté until translucent and soft, stirring occasionally.
While the veggies are sauteing, add the mushrooms to the food processor and pulse until finely chopped (or chop by hand). Add the chopped mushrooms to the pan and cook for 3-4 minutes until starting to brown. Next add the tomato paste, sea salt (add more to taste), and optional crushed red pepper flakes and cook for about 1 minute, stirring constantly.
Stir in the crushed tomatoes, water, and lentils. Bring the sauce to a boil and cover the pan. Reduce the heat to low and simmer for ~30 minutes, stirring about every 10 minutes, until the sauce has thickened and the lentils are tender and starting to break down. (it took about 25 minutes and I stirred more often because I did not want the red lentils to stick once they started breaking down) Then stir in the optional chopped basil (if you have it) and turn off the heat. Taste and adjust as needed, adding more tomato paste for richness or salt to taste.
I made this in the morning so it would have time to sit. You can make it a day ahead, too. If you are eating right away when the sauce is nearly done, bring a large pot of water to a boil. Once boiling, add the pasta and cook according to package instructions, stirring occasionally to prevent sticking.
Once the pasta is al dente (tender with a little bite), drain it and divide between your serving bowls. Top with your desired amount of sauce and garnish with parmesan cheese and more fresh basil (both optional).
Leftover sauce will keep in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to 3-4 days or in the freezer for up to 1 month. I promise it won’t last four days and freeze, ha!
Contact
If you have any questions on nourishing your gut as you host and help during the holidays or on integrating beans for gut health into your daily meals, please email me at Denisemancieri1@gmail.com. Feel free to comment below if there are topics you would like to see.
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Note: I am not a doctor. I am a teacher and an educator with an earned doctorate in educational leadership. I enjoy research and I can parse large amounts of information into easily understood and digestible pieces allowing people to understand what is happening to their body and possible steps to reverse it with food as medicine. I have healed my own GI issues through choices with food. I followed Karen Hurd’s bean protocol diet, I meditated and still do and I healed. I feel compelled to be in service and educate others as the more people eating beans, alongside a healthy diet and sharing their stories the more people will live a healthier existence. Joy, peace and freedom abound. Please see your doctor and discuss nutritional options before you change any course of action with your health.